Orange County Floor Kitchen Bath

My dog use to do trick and listen. He could roll over, sit, play dead, lay down, spin.
Now when ever i have a treat he just does every tick he can think of without listening to me, and as fast as he can.
Also, he wont lay down on hard wood or tile floors no matter how much you offer him to do it.
He doesnt like to get pet, only scratched in one spot otherwise he will walk away.
When you call him you have to scream at him or else he’ll walk over really slow or not show up at all. (hes not hard of hearing)
He wont play fetch cause he is scared of any object thrown.
He is completley terrified of water and just holding a cup near him will drive him mile away.
Why does my dog suck so much. Is there any techniques I can use to teach him to behave better. Or atleast come when beconed?

We are remodeling our entire condo and the cabinets are horrible oak with white laminate. We can paint the oak and while there is some paint that will adhere to the laminate Im thinking we should try something else. What are our options short of replacing the doors?